Three Steps Between
by nytecat
Summary: Shizuru finds the dreariness of college life is almost too much to bear. Luckily, Natsuki decides to stop by. Rating changed from M to T.


_**Title: Three Steps Between**_

_Author's note: This story is dedicated to Hoppy Chan. _

_The title is shamelessly borrowed from Rakushun's quote_ _in The Twelve Kingdoms anime. The idea of biscuits and studying is borrowed from the film, "Stranger Than Fiction". Sorry, it took so long to write it – this is the seventh version of the story!_

The doorbell rang; breaking the hallowed silence like church bells in the morning. Shizuru spared the door a small suspicious scowl before returning her attention to her laptop's screen. The text blurred in and out of focus. The tawny haired woman cursed when she realised that she had been typing the same sentence for the last five lines.

Shizuru rubbed her aching eyes with the heel of her palms then savagely deleted the repetition. Even those small movements caused her body to tremor with weariness. How long had it been since she slept? Three days? What day was it anyway?

The doorbell interrupted her disjointed train of thoughts.

She sighed as she unfolded herself out from under the table, using the table as a leverage to stand up.

The young college student absently combed her fingers through her tangled mane as she walked to the door. The distance seemed greater than she remembered.

As she moved, she felt her creased night shirt stick to her body like a filthy second skin. It took her a moment to notice that several buttons had come undone and she did them up before she opened the door. Tired as she was, it did not occur to her to look through the peep hole first. The sight that greeted her shocked her to speechlessness.

"My love..."

There stood Natsuki in black jeans and a white blouse. Her customary biker's helmet was conspicuously nowhere in sight. It took Shizuru a moment to remember that her love had sold her bike a few weeks back. Wearied though she was, the older college student could not resist savouring the sight of her lover, trailing her crimson eyes hungrily over the woman's sculptured body.

When she saw what Natsuki held in her hands, Shizuru bit back a giggle. Her lips quirked into an amused smile. It took all her will power to restrain herself. It would not do to laugh. No, not at all. Not when Natsuki was looking so adorably serious.

The raven-haired woman noticed Shizuru's glance and hefted the container in her hands self-consciously.

"I brought you some biscuits for a snack."

The taller woman eyed the tupperware warily as if it was a snake. She made her voice was cool and polite. "Did you bake them?"

Natsuki opened her mouth, the lie clearly forming on her lips but then she blushed, averting her eyes. "No, Mai did," she murmured to her feet.

"How sweet of you," Shizuru purred, her warm tone making Natsuki look up with a sheepish grin. "And please pass on my gratitude to Mai when you see her."

Natsuki blinked in surprise, her mouth opened to speak but she closed it quickly. She quietly took the subtle hint. Wordlessly, she passed the container over to Shizuru.

"Well...then I'll leave you to your studying," Natsuki cheerfully replied with a small sunny smile, her hand reaching up to unconsciously clutch her shoulder as she slowly retreated several steps back. The flash of disappointment in her emerald eyes tore at Shizuru's heart. Damn it, the older woman swore to herself.

She made herself smile that special smile she reserved only for Natsuki. The effort it cost her made her dizzy. Her voice sparkled with forced humour. "Ara, Natsuki... where are you going?"

"Well, you need to study and I thought I was disturbing you and..." Natsuki began, getting more flustered as she continued. Her confused expression filled Shizuru with warmth, faster than any brandy could.

"Foolish woman, I would love your company," Shizuru murmured, pulling Natsuki in for a kiss with her free hand.

But Natsuki recoiled, breaking their contact before they even touched.

"Shizuru..."

Her love's voice was low and horrified. Shizuru's blood chilled when she heard it.

"Natsuki, what's the matter?"

Natsuki hesitated, biting her lip in indecision. Finally, she gathered her courage. "Shizuru...when...was the last time you bathed?"

* * *

The tea was ready by the time Shizuru came out of the shower. Natsuki lifted the kettle off the stove and closed the flame, all the while studying her love covertly. The older woman wordlessly towelled her sandy hair dry as she listlessly took a seat on the couch. Her blue bathrobe was wet where her hair touched it. Shizuru's pale pallor and dark circles under her eyes worried Natsuki but she was careful not to let it show.

"How are you feeling?" the younger woman asked in a chirpy tone as she placed a mug of hot Earl Grey and plate of nuked biscuits on the table. She took a seat next to Shizuru.

At first, it seemed the older college student did not hear the question. Then abruptly she blinked slowly and looked languidly at the raven-haired woman. Her eyes were venomous. Natsuki had the sudden realisation that her insinuation of Shizuru's less than desirable body scent had rankled the normally genteel woman's sensibilities.

Before Natsuki could apologise, Shizuru averted her gaze to the mug. She cradled it and focused on staring into the steam rising up from the beverage – as if it was the only thing beside her in the room.

The quiet deepened into a stark silence that lasted an eternity. So absorbed was she in listening to Shizuru breathe that Natsuki jumped when her love suddenly spoke.

"Natsuki, what are you doing here?"

The younger woman frowned in consternation. She could not understand the reason for Shizuru's cold tone. The last time she had used that tone... Natsuki shivered at the memory. It was a dark night when her love killed Yukino's Child and ultimately, Haruka. Why was Shizuru acting this way now?

"I want to be here...with you," Natsuki asserted. She took a chance and reached out to cradle Shizuru's face. The older woman shied away from her touch. Natsuki slowly lowered her hand, trying to ignore the pain that branded her heart.

"Even if I am such bad company?" Shizuru asked quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. Her eyes were still on the surface of her tea.

"Well, we can't be sunny all the time!" Natsuki answered in anger. Then mentally slapped herself, what kind of inane comment was that? she moaned inwardly.

Shizuru smirked at that. A dark smirk that cut into the younger woman's soul. Suddenly, Shizuru put down the mug and rubbed her temples wearily. Her cold demeanour slipped away as if it had never been, leaving behind a woman tired beyond endurance.

This time when Natsuki reached out to cradle her, Shizuru did not pull away. Instead the woman nestled into her arms and laid her cheek wearily on the younger woman's shoulder. Absently, Natsuki reached up to stroke her hair.

"I'm sorry," Shizuru murmured softly, her voice filled with regret and guilt. "I'm tired. I haven't slept or eaten in days. I don't even remember what day it is. I..." the woman's voice faded off and she shook her head slightly. Disdain twisted her features and she sighed quietly. She pulled away from Natsuki and turned to face her. Her crimson eyes were dark but clear. "No... I have no excuses. I'm sorry but I won't ask you to forgive me."

For a moment, Natsuki merely stared at her. Then slowly, ever so slowly, she reached up with one hand and cradled her love's cheek. "I would think after all we've been through, it would take more than mere words to tear us apart," she replied gently, her emerald eyes clear and certain. The hand on Shizuru's cheek glided up and forward, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. Natsuki smiled then. Her rare sweet smile. "And, you have nothing to apologise for, love."

Shizuru returned the smile. It was her first genuine smile Natsuki had seen on her this afternoon. It brightened her soul to see her love happy. On that thought, Natsuki reached for a biscuit and turned to the older woman.

"Hungry?" she asked teasingly, waving the biscuit playfully.

Shizuru grinned. "Famished."

Natsuki held out the biscuit, Shizuru prowled forward like a jungle cat. The younger woman let the brunette take a small bite, then pulled it out of reach. "Sorry, the first one was free."

"Oh?" Shizuru managed to articulate, excitement making her throat tight.

"Yesss...you have to pay a kiss for each bite."

Shizuru merely laughed and dutifully paid the fee.

It was only after the plate of biscuits was barren when Shizuru spoke again, her head lying in comfort on Natsuki's lap.

"Sometimes...sometimes I wonder if it was the right decision to study here at Waseda University."

Natsuki idly twirled a sandy lock around her fingers. "Waseda has one of the best business programmes right? And you wanted to pursue a master's degree in International Relations and International Management. It seemed a good choice."

The older woman laughed bitterly. "It is a good university...it's just..." she trailed off, frustrated at her inability to voice out one of her darkest fears.

Natsuki said nothing, instinctively giving her space to sort out her feelings. After many moments, Shizuru finally said: "I...I just can't help but wonder if I am doing this for my sake or my father's."

Her love's green eyes blinked in sudden understanding. "No wonder you were in a bad mood. You resent being here. You resent yourself for forcing yourself to be here." Her love's hand on her hair was gentle, soothing.

Shizuru nodded, surprised at Natsuki's insight. "It's almost as if I was trapped in the HiME destiny again except..."

"Except this time you don't have love to see you through it?" Natsuki finished quietly for her.

Shizuru nodded again, her throat tight. Natsuki lowered her head so that her hair fell forward. Her words when she spoke were as soft as snowflakes and warmer than the sun.

"Shizuru...you have me. Whatever you choose to do, I'm here for you," she said with sombre seriousness then broke into a small smile. She could not resist adding: "...and Mai's biscuits as well."

Shizuru laughed at the absurdity of that statement. It felt so good to laugh that she did not want to stop. After a moment, Natsuki joined her. When at last the final shivers of mirth left her, Shizuru sat up. Her raven-haired love watched her quietly as she got up and went to her laptop.

She placed a hand on the top and glanced over at Natsuki. There was a guarded look of resignation in those deep green eyes. Shizuru smiled reassuringly and lowered the top shut.

"What about your global economics paper?" Natsuki asked quietly.

Shizuru's reply was to undo the sash on her bathrobe. Her voice was rough, raw with desire. "It can wait 20 minutes." She crawled into Natsuki's welcome embrace, finding eager hands to disrobe her. She pressed a kiss onto her love's soft lips. "Or an hour. Or two."

It was some time later when they stopped moving, their moans replaced by pants. They snuggled together on the couch, exhaustion claiming them. As Natsuki was drowsily succumbing to sleep, Shizuru whispered in her ear.

"Natsuki..."

"Hmm...?"

"Thanks for stopping by."


End file.
